Family, isn't it about... mine?

So after a blazing fast start to this blog, we've kinda slown down a bit. (Since when is "slown" not a word? Dang spell check makes me realize how ignorant I really am. But I'd rather have it tell me than have you do it, Nik Mason.) I guess its time to stimulate the minds of all you uneffective people out there. And i feel that its time for a post that isn't about sports. (Especially since Blair and Brock just put me on blast about who I do or don't like. Go Cowboys!!!!!)

So I thought this post could be about something everyone has an opinion on. I want to hear from you people about your life perspective based on your birth order. lol. Random, I know. My little brother Riley came down to Provo over Memorial Day weekend, and we got to spend a lot of time together. (I come from a family with 4 sons. It goes me, Riley, Robbie, and Quinn. Riley is 22. Then Robbie who is almost 20 and on his mission in El Salvador. Quinn is last at 17 and hates every minute of being the youngest.)

Those 3 days are probably the most time Riley and I have ever spent together outside of a family trip to Lake Chelan a few year ago. (I think we all still have nightmares about that excursion, and I'm glad no pictures exist to remind us. But we appreciate the effort Mom and Dad. hahaha. jk, it was...um...a good escape from everything in life that we liked. haha.) Anyway, I kept introducing Riley to my friends as my younger brother and didn't think anything of it. He turned to me one time and said, "Its so weird to be called that. You're the only person in the world that can introduce me like that." It got me thinking about birth order and how different our perspectives are. I mean, I have 3 younger brothers, so the idea of "my younger brother" is pretty normal to me. But what is it like for the middle kids who have younger and older siblings? How about the youngest, who only has older siblings? Does it make them feel inferior to be called a younger sibling? I have no idea what its like. And don't even get me started on the idea of having sisters! What do you have to do wrong to be born into a family with girls?! (jk jk jk. But it would be a whole different experience to have sisters.) I realize that marriage will be a huge eye-opener for me when I have to learn how to live with a girl, but I'd much rather just get it all over in one brutal experience with my wife than have to go through years of agony as a child and youth in a house with girl issues and drama. (Hahaha. I know a lot of people are now offended, and I'm totally not entirely serious ["totally not entirely?"], but can you see my point? I'm sure plenty of guys with sisters can admit I've missed out on some horrors.) I know I missed out on a lot of cool things by not having any sisters, but do the positives outweigh the negatives? Someone enlighten me. As a matter of fact, I would appreciate any enlightenment from anyone who has a different point of view. Or even the same one.

As the oldest child, I felt like the guinea pig sometimes. I know my little brothers got to do some things that my parents never would allow me to do. And vice versa. I think its obvious and necessary that parents learn with the first child, and then make adjustments as more come along. I'm just saying that's how I felt. And I made sure to point out the times when my siblings got to do stuff I never did at their age. haha. "That's not fair!!! You never let me have sleepovers when I was that age!!!" I also feel like I was supposed to grow up quicker than the others. I was babysitting my younger brothers when I was 10 and 11, but my parents wouldn't even let Quinn stay home alone until he was a teenager. Maybe I'm remembering this wrong, but that sure is what it seems like.

Another thing, I always felt like I had to be perfect. There was lots of pressure to be the good example and not make any mistakes or else my brothers would see them and think they were okay to make. That might be part of the reason I didn't hang out with my brothers very much. I didn't want to risk making a mistake around them, and by not being around them the pressure was off. I always felt like I had to do the right things and that mistakes weren't ok. Maybe this is why I'm so competitive and can't stand losing. I don't deal with failure very well. And I know that feeling like I had to be perfect made me a very demanding older brother. I always let them know when they made mistakes or didn't do what they were supposed to. I'm not proud of that, I'm just telling you how things were. I feel bad that I was such a police officer all the time. I probably put more pressure on my brothers to be perfect than my parents put on me. Do any other oldest children feel the same way? Did this happen in other families?

Man, it seems like this blog turned into a confessional. haha. But I've just been thinking a lot about family dynamics and if they are the same or similar in all families. And what is it like if you are an only child? I was almost 5 before Riley was born, and I can admit it was an adjustment to learn to share my parents' time. But what if you never have to learn to share it? C'mon people. Pipe in. I feel like there is a lot more I wanted to say, but I can't remember any of it now. That's why I'm uneffective. :-) So fill in the blanks.